Then I began to remember...

I've never really felt as old as I am, even when I was younger. 18 years old felt more like 15 and at 21 I DEFINITELY didn't feel legal. So when I was asked to write about what it feels like to be "the most senior member" of TDC, My first thought was "Well it feels just like the first year..."

Photo by William Frederking

Then I began to remember.

How scared I was. How nervous I had been about my technique EVERY rehearsal. How many jobs I worked just to be able to eek out a living so that I could spend another month in Chicago able to dance with TDC. How I could stroll into rehearsal after a full day and dance my butt of without thinking about it, then wake up the next morning feeling like a million bucks. How my feet didn't hurt, and my knees didn't crack with every plie or lunge I performed. How long I spent on the CTA, EVERYDAY. How the girls that I was dancing with were some of the funniest, smartest, most loving people I had met and how they made my transition to living in the city and joining the company smoother. What I remember and forget all at the same time is how quickly I have twirled my way through 7 seasons, all because time flies when you're with people you enjoy being around. Being the most senior member now I hope that my presence does for our newer members what the oldie goldie girls I danced with back in 2008, did for me. They created an inviting and accepting environment, full of creative energy and support, laughter and advice and they are still a HUGE part of my life today. When I look back on my time dancing with TDC and in the Chicago dance community I know I will remember the performances and projects I have been a part of but more than that, I will know the people I shared those experiences with helped shape who I am today both as a dancer and an "adult". No matter if I feel like one or not. 

Submitted by TDC Dancer Olivia May on Wednesday, March 25, 2015.  

Looking up to the girls

When my young 23-year-old-self stood in the rehearsal space, it was a pleasure looking up to the top dogs who were the heart and soul of TDC – Molly Grimm-Leasure, Maggie Koller, Alaina Murray, Kaitlin Bishop, Jessica Post, Olivia May, and Summer Avery. Holding much respect for these women, I embraced the opportunity to learn from each of them, all the while carefully surveilling their technique. The way they worked together and moved; I was constantly in awe. We created concrete bonds that helped shape who I am today. Even though things have shifted since then, we still remain as friends.

In 2009, Shannon Edwards and I came into the company as apprentices. The year prior, Summer was an apprentice and had then moved up in the company as a member. I felt that we connected most and I like to think it was because she understood where I was coming from and how it felt to stand where I was. (That could also just be that Summer is such a giving person and probably one of the nicest people I know.) She took me under her wing and I recall numerous times she was there for me especially when I just needed a friend.

Summer was the first to leave that year. She was moving out of state and I still remember that sad announcement. It was devastating because a piece of us, a piece of who I was, was leaving. Over the years things changed, and we lost the top dogs slowly along the way - many of them being a part of TDC for over 7 years or more. Each one was sad because the TDC that I knew and loved was them. It is comparable to moving on and separating from your childhood friends because you watched each other grow up; nobody knows you like they do. Now in this moment, it is hard to realize that I am where they used to stand. Olivia is now the senior member, along with Shannon and I a year thereafter. We have had great loss and I have come to accept that people come into our lives for a reason and people live their lives according to their own plans. Things cannot stay the same forever and I cherish those years. (I also miss former apprentice, Molly Kirkpatrick, as she ventures off to grad school this fall.) And again, with great loss comes great gain. We have had members come and go and the TDC of today is full of strong women who I admire just the same. Madelyn Doyle and Julie Boruff now have a few years under their belt as well, and not to mention, are two of my closest friends.

I feel so overwhelmed writing this because of my experience with these energetic influences. We put our hearts, emotions and tears on that dance floor – hours upon end until we were exhausted and beat but we always made it through because we had each other.

Margi ultimately makes the final decision when it comes to roll call. Not one rehearsal goes by that I do not think about how she has never given up on me. She takes chances and risks on people. And not only does she worry about strong performance qualities and technique, but how about dedication and passion? And from a dancer’s standpoint, getting into a dance company in Chicago is slim to none. What makes you more exciting to watch out of thirty-five people? Trust me, back at the time of my audition, my technique was nowhere near stellar, but I was excited and confident and inventive in my movement generation. Six years later (besides feeling what we call the “A-G-E”), I feel grounded and strong and wise. My technique has improved and I make even smarter choices when creating material. I also could not have been able to choreograph my own piece on such a refined level without Margi, and I am very proud of that personal accomplishment.  We go through so much in our lives and never once has she not supported or believed in me. This process that we go through, we may struggle, we may tire, we may scrap hours of hard work, but this process is raw and beautiful and intelligent and great.

When you begin something, sometimes you do not know how it will end, even if you have an end in mind. I never wanted the group to change when I was in the moment, but as it was and had happened, it was great to see how the group has evolved and shifted. It is also great now to see some new bodies in the space, Jamie Corliss and Liz Conway.

I am grateful for my chance at this opportunity and as I do not know where I will stand at the end of this path, I am savoring my journey. My experience with these unique individuals has made me a stronger dancer, better performer and a more plentiful human being.  I am infinitely grateful to be surrounded by a great group of people in my dance community and genuine friends I can depend on. Through it all, now being one of the leaders of the group, I just hope I can provide the girls with what the top dogs once permitted to me. 






Submitted by TDC Dancer Katie Petrunich, Tuesday, October 14, 2014.

What's Next?

Photo by William Frederking

After what seemed like the longest, most dreadful, never-ending winter, The Dance COLEctive is looking forward to a couple of exciting performances. While this year has not been one testing us on our powers to prepare for performances it has been one to test us on how many layers of clothing we can don while side-stepping mega pot holes on our way to rehearsal Tuesday and Thursday nights. All said, the upcoming month should prove to be a special one as we comb the vaults for video to re-create  "13", a comical and equal parts gut wrenching and heart warming look into the lives of thirteen year olds. One of my favorite TDC pieces to perform, it also happens to be a crowd pleaser and getting to dig back into our characters in the piece will be like trying on a familiar comfy sweater.

For the love of Brooke.... to call up my character (a fashion faux-pas, crowd hovering, wedge picking young lady of 13) takes a whole different level of awkward exploration. She is mildly clued in to her un-coolness, but despite many efforts cannot seem to crack the social acceptance code. To her credit she wears her personality on her sleeve and holds her chin high, literally. While it is easy to find comedy in all that Brooke is on stage, it is mildly heart breaking to know that she is inspired by real events and experiences, mostly mine. Don't feel too sorry for Brooke she might bump and clatter through puberty but her resilience will prove to be her strongest quality, and know there are Brookes everywhere, even within you.

After recently spending sometime working with the wonderful Peter Carpenter on our skills to better vocalize while moving we head into these performance projects armed with tools to dive deeper into the text that already colors "13". As always it is my hope that we take the material and performance to a new level finding more meaning within the sub-text and connecting with a new audience who has yet to experience this piece.  Hope to see your at our next performance at the Elgin Ties Dance Festival on April 25 at 7:30pm. 

Submitted by TDC company member Olivia May on Sunday, March 31, 2014.

Five years forward or Five years back?

 

Photo by Eric Olson

Where will I be in five years? It seems a popular question to ask.  But for me, the opposite question gives me more opportunity to assess my current state.  Five years ago, where did I think I would be today?

Allow me to start at the beginning. After graduating with a BFA in Dance, Performance & Choreography, I moved to Chicago to pursue dancing with The Dance COLEctive.  Four years later, I am now the Manager of a small children's dance studio here in Chicago, the owner of which lives out of state. Like most people, whatever I thought I would be doing five years ago is not what has happened or even will eventually happen. I had never dreamed of owning a dance studio, and I certainly never thought I would find myself running one for someone else. So here I am, making a career out of my passion (and the degree that I will be working to pay off for the next 15 years) and taking every opportunity I can to squeeze the juice out of this life in order to make a living. 

Ups and downs come with any job and just because I am working in a career field that also happens to be my passion does not eliminate those struggles. It DOES force me  to evaluate my life and my "passion" on a daily basis. I often ask myself " Do I really know what I am doing?" or " Is this going to work?" When it comes to studio business decisions, I go with my gut; to be honest, most of what I have done is completely trial and error. Luckily, it has worked out so far and I have helped to grow the business through what I would call 'Personal Force'. Being the only Manager, teaching most of the classes, and being responsible for all the administration and housekeeping, I am literally doing it  ALL. However, at the same time I am responsible for it ALL. Do we want to increase enrollment numbers by adding classes in the morning? Sure! Olivia will teach those. Do we want to encourage community togetherness with Friday night dance parties? Yes! Olivia will teach those. More dancers equals more phone calls, of which Olivia will answer. Should we make a shift to being paperless in our communication? Of course! That means more emails for Olivia to answer. I have found that with growth comes more "opportunity", but when you are the all-in-one manager/teacher/maid/administrator that means more work for YOU. 

Quite literally, I have opened the door for this growth and then accepted the consequences by taking on more responsibilities. Of course it is rewarding to see that what I am doing is working, but I often wonder if this work I am doing (for someone else's business) is the best path for me.  Should I reevaluate what part of the dance world my passion lies?  Where do I think I will be in 5 years? I really don't know, so be sure to check back in with me in 2019, and I will let you know how these next five years pan out.

Submitted by TDC dancer Olivia May, on Tuesday, March 13, 2014. 

Evolution of a fall leaf...

Looking at TDC before delving in, the dancers consisted of a strong bunch of women. Molly Grimm-Leasure, Maggie Koller, Alaina Murray, Summer Breal, Olivia May, Molly Perez, Kaitlin Bishop, and Jessica Post stood out to me. When I thought of TDC, I thought of these girls. They were my inspiration as they maneuvered bodies through space, leaped, shifted, and made the stage breathe. I never imagined I’d have a chance in the world to be a part of such a talented group who work so well together. And little did I know that I'd have the opportunity, and honor, to dance with them for years to come.

Photo by William Frederking

Shannon McGuire-Edwards and I came in as apprentices in 2009. Shannon and I took a few classes during our college years and became friends, so it was nice to have a familiar face to experience a dynamic change with. We stuck together, created phrases, wore similar outfits to rehearsal (and still do) and redeemed our dual nickname - the fall leaves.  I still can’t believe it’s our fourth season together.

Since then, TDC has been a perpetual constant in my life. There have been so many changes in my personal life, as others in the company, we’ve become a support system as well as an outlet. No matter how bad my day was and sometimes when motivation is lacking in my body, these girls always make me smile. And dancing… well, it’s always just a great reminder of what truly makes me happy, and there’s never a day that goes by that I’m not thankful that I’ve been given the opportunity to be able to do what I love.

Throughout the years, there have been several shifts in the company. Things change, people’s lives change, and we’ve had to say goodbye to several members along the way, a few of whom have danced the longevity of the company. Last season, we had to hold back tears as Molly Grimm-Leasure and Alaina Murray retired their bare feet off the dance floor. Current senior members consist of Maggie Koller and Olivia May. Shannon and I are next in line. Sometimes I can’t believe it because of my initial idea of the company consisting of the strong group of women I had mentioned earlier. To be honest, I still consider them as part of the group. They’ll always be TDC in my eyes, no matter how it shifts and changes. We have an amazing group of women right now and I couldn’t be more thrilled. Margi always says she’s so upset that we don’t get along. :-)   It’s pretty impressive that a group of 8 women can actually get along so well. She always says that she has to create a pallet for TDC, and I’m glad she sees me fitting into the mix.

Margi’s dancers typically dedicate several years at a time, which allows for the partnering and the movement vocabulary to be rich and full. It’s great to build and keep that trust, permitting us to rely on each other. We put in 6.5 to 10.5 hours in each week, I’d say 9 months out of the year (not including show weeks). We work hard, but we also enjoy ourselves. We’re all here solely for our love of dance, to be creative, to perform, and we’re grateful to have Margi Cole as our fearless leader.

TDC is like my second family and I don’t know how I could ever live without these girls in my life, continuously creating friendships and bonds that I couldn’t have found anywhere else. I truly think it keeps me sane during my work week. I embrace it every time I stand in front of the mirror during floor exercises or warm up. I’m not sure where my life will take me, so I’m embracing every dreadful développé, soaking up every swish, and embodying movement that becomes part of history, and turns into memories.

Submitted by TDC Dancer Katie Petrunich on Monday, March 18, 2013

The Big Leagues

After graduating from Appalachian State University in the mountains of North Carolina with degrees in Dance Studies and Psychology in May 2011, I knew that I wanted to continue dancing. I didn’t exactly know how I was going to do that, but I knew that I wanted to find a dance community in which I wouldn’t lose myself. A place where I could be challenged creatively and fulfill my desire to be a part of making and presenting interesting and meaningful work. Somewhere I could be part of the process and part of a team. I feel so blessed to have found all of these things as an apprentice this season with The Dance COLEctive! 

Photo by Eric Olson

I visited Chicago only a handful of times before I decided to move here this past June. I loved the city. It felt like a big city with a small neighborhood feel and extremely friendly people. I was up for a new adventure. I took dance classes at a number of dance studios whenever I was in Chicago. Then, during one of my visits, TDC company member Olivia May invited me to  an open company class. I knew Olivia from our hometown of Raleigh, NC. I am so grateful to her for allowing me to tag along and get a taste of the the Dance COLEctive. The class was wonderful! All the dancers were welcoming and Margi’s class was challenging and fun.

When I finally built up enough courage (and money) to make the move to the big windy city, I made the leap. With a good friend from home, in a Penske truck filled with all of our belongings, we steered north – and a little west.  Once in Chicago, I tried to take advantage of as many dance classes and opportunities as I could. I was overwhelmed (and still am) by how much is going on here. I attended The Dance COLEctive audition in August, immensely intimidated to be at my first ever professional audition. After auditions and call backs, I was so pleased to be offered an apprentice position with the company. I literally jumped up and down when I received the email from Margi. And now, after our first performance together this season, I really feel a part of it all. Surrounded by inspiring and powerful women, dancing to my heart’s content, I can officially say I’m livin’ the dream.

Submitted by TDC Apprentice Molly Kirkpatrick on Sunday, February 10, 2013.

Dance is like poetry of the hips not the lips...

Dance is like poetry of the hips not the lips
when i tell others i'm a dancer i clarify with,
"but i don't make any tips"
making dance is fun but its definitely no party.
Here's a taste of the creative process with Margi.

It starts with an idea, maybe a book or some quotes
we talk it over, think it out, and each jot down some notes
we use our official notebooks to write stories and words
when it comes to the creative process
we leave no resource unturned.

Its a full body experience, from your fingers to your toes
using every fiber and every ounce to make solos
we rub them into duets and smash them into trios
Margi adds her flare here and there
and the dance, its starts to form.

We watch and give notes, we try one thing then another
we space it out and pace it out and when it doesn't work
we take a breath or even ten and regroup to start again.

Sometimes its hard to see the vision but we know we're always close
we put our faith in our fearless leader and she pulls all the ropes.
She asks us questions or gives us directions
she knows the big picture but never forgets the small
her magic is in the details and how she composes it all.

It has to be a challenge at 9 O'clock at night
but she's always ready, always thinking
always challenging us with what we're making
the point of the toe or touch of a hand
it never slips past her when it comes to small details
she is a master.

It can be frustrating and it can get long
there's no formula and sometimes there is no song
you just have to get out there and start with an idea
you let it grow and sometimes change
you give it life and then a name
we make it ours and hold it close
and then share it with those who love dance most.

Tuesday and Thursday nights at our beloved Drucker Center
we meet with Margi, its no party
but we're proud of what we do and who we do it with
and in a month and a few weeks you will get to experience it.

It's a very open forum, this creative process
its ever changing always engaging
and i can only hope i will get better at it with time.

Submitted by TDC Dancer Olivia May on Tuesday, December 4, 2012.

Performing to Perform

Since declaring that I would be studying dance in college when I was just barely into my Senior year of high school, I have met the question " So what will you do with a degree in dance?" more times than I care to count. I understand where the question comes from, sort of. Everyone's first thought goes toward teaching," So will you be a teacher…?" or to owning a dance studio, then they think of performing. However, I have ALWAYS wanted to be a performer, and frankly I try to find ways I can perform everyday of my life. I was born a Ham (aka a limelight lover) and will probably be living the old adage " the world is your stage" until the day that I die. I live for a good crowd, mostly a good laugh from a willing audience and don't usually find myself in social situations where I don't make my presence known. So for me, there was never a second thought as to what I would do with a BFA in Dance.

I was going to perform. I was set on it.

All the doors and windows of opportunity were open to me, and I was going to walk across that stage at graduation, promptly get my diploma, and walk my happy behind right onto the stage of dance and perform. I didn't have a timetable for how long I would be a performer but sure as the day was long, I was NOT going back to school anytime soon, and I was not waiting around saving my money while working a non-dance job until I found the performance job I wanted.

After graduation, I was on a  sort of dance tour of my own, taking my blind optimism and endless energy for rejection up and down the east coast and some of the midwest trying to find a place to perform. I soon realized that while I REALLY wanted to perform, there were a lot of dance companies that REALLY didn't want to hurt my feelings but at the same time REALLY didn't want me to perform with them. By an act of fate, I landed in Chicago before my optimism and energy for rejection ran out with two suitcases and a smile, and set up shop with The Dance COLEctive. What I then realized was that I had only just begun my quest to perform on stage.

I was in a new city with zero friends, no place to live and no job. Suddenly the idea of performing took a back seat to my survival and the goal of living somewhere other than a street corner in a cardboard box. My personal worst fear in life is to be homeless.

What I came to understand is the doors and windows of opportunity are only open as long as you force your body weight through them, stick fingers and toes into the cracks and wedge the space apart to make room for yourself and thus make opportunities for yourself. I looked into every job I thought I might be able to do:  coach swimming, teach English,  serve food, paint fences. If it was a job and I could imagine myself doing it then I applied, I called, I stopped by the office to drop off my resume. If I was hired, I took it. It didn't matter how far away it was or how few hours a week it offered, I was going to do it. Then, on Tuesday and Thursday nights, I was going to go to rehearsal with TDC and work on my performance opportunity.

Well, as it turns out, wanting to perform became more of a need to perform, because with a BFA in Dance, I have finally found my way through enough jobs to land my ideal job: teaching dance. In a small dance studio with a captive audience of seven year olds, I use my flare for performance to make them laugh and teach them to pivot and kick-ball-change and to love dance and performing just as much as I do. I think I may have tricked myself into teaching because the front of a classroom (no matter what type of class) is a sort of stage. So naturally, I feel at home. But I need to be good at my job so I can afford to keep myself afloat, and thus be able to perform with The Dance COLEctive. So here I am, 5 years out of college with my old rosy view of being a Dance Performer, and I. am. performing. on stage with the Dance COLEctive in as many chances as I can force myself into…. But I also get to perform everyday in my job as Miss Olivia, the quirky dance teacher who loves any stage and a willing audience.

Submitted by TDC Dancer Olivia May on Tuesday, November 13, 2012.